Roadside Mysteries

At last count there were at least 22 parlors in town where one or more tattoo artists apply their trade.  I plan to visit them all some day just to add what I find on Roadside Mysteries because it is a mystery why there are really 22 tattoo parlors in a town with a population of a little over 140,000. While I have yet to visit any tattoo parlor I am fairly certain that if and when it happens I will not subject myself to indelible markings. Think Department of Corrections Category: Scars/Marks/Tattoos: Cross/Trible Tattoo on Right Forearm, Dragon Tattoo on Right Arm, D.C. Tattoo on Back.  Identifying marks on the body. No! I won’t do it! However:

In the interest of science, I recently submitted to a rather unusual marking of my skin.

It’s a Bed Bug Tattoo!

I decided to get a tattoo of my favorite local bike shop brand : Black Sheep Bikes. Their logo is a sheep. Yes, I know it’s supposed to be a BLACK sheep, but red is the only color a bed bug knows. So, what are Bed Bugs?

Bed Bug Tattoo artist of the genus Cimex

A bite from a bed bug can cause skin rashes (the redness in color important for tattoos), various allergic symptoms (it’s a chance you have to take) and possible psychological effects (who could tell?) .  The little buggers need human blood to survive and after their bite and the resulting color change due to irritation on the skin the markings could  be used as body art to some extent: It’s a Win – Win situation. Bugs get fed, You get art!

If you would like to have a bed bug tattoo I have illustrated some steps you will have to follow in order to do this right.

1) Select the artwork

I have chosen to get a tattoo of the company logo for the Black Sheep Bike Company located right here in Fort Collins, Colorado. If you go to the website of the Black Sheep company, at the top of the site are the words “Black Sheep” and there’s a little graphic of a sheep. It’s kind of cool, and only those that are “in” to custom bikes will recognize it for what it is. There are other logos out there, but some are easier to work with than others, so read further before you choose the artwork for your tattoo.

2) Choose a suitable mask material

Here’s the thing: The bed bugs are going to have to bite in specific areas of your skin in order to create an image that is recognizable. The mask allows the bugs to do their work in the interest of art and science.  In this case I am using  an Avery Badge Label #5895 for the mask material.  The adhesive backing on the Avery label will help keep the mask in place during feeding and it will also help keep the label on the computer screen if you carefully remove the backing on each corner of the label before attaching it to the screen.

3) Trace the artwork onto the label

This is fairly easy. The label paper is thin enough that you can see the screen image through the paper. A pencil works well for this purpose.

4) Cut the mask

This is the hard part. You have to cut away the part of the image that you want to transfer to your skin. It’s best not to choose a logo that is too complicated. Also, if your image includes any kind of lettering (text), the cutout on the non-adhesive side should be a mirror image of the text.

In the above example, I used a single edge razor blade. You may find it easier to use one of those X-Acto type cutting knifes; I couldn’t find mine, so I used a razor blade.

5) Find the place where bed bugs live

In most developed countries in the 1950’s, bed bugs were almost unknown as human pests due to the use of strong insecticides such as DDT. Now you can find them lots of places in the U.S. but since some say that bed bugs could be infected by as many as 28 human pathogens, you may want to check out a few “clean” bugs from your local entomologist. Hey, I know where there are clean bugs! They live at the Insectary of course. We visited there in 2011. Time to go back and check out some bugs.

6) Prepare yourself for the bite of your life!

Here I am in the entomology lab with my right arm exposed. In my left hand is a Mason Jar full of little starving bed bugs who haven’t had a good blood meal in months! The top of the jar is covered with a light mesh material and on top of the mesh is the finished Avery label with the black Sheep logo cut out. Check the clock! You need to hold the inverted jar on your arm for at least 25 minutes to ensure that all the bed bugs get at least one bite!

7) Pain in the Name of Science

No, not too bad actually. You can feel the little buggers bite into your skin, but it’s not anything that I would consider painful. Bed bugs are typically night feeders, so their bites usually will not wake you while you are asleep. These guys were very hungry and they got down to business right away. In 25 minutes it was over!

‘8) OK, so where’s the tattoo?

After the required 25 minute ordeal, you must slowly and carefully lift the jar off your skin to make sure that the bed bugs have time to remove their blood sucking sippy straws. This is a critical step as you don’t want to harm the bugs and you don’t want used insect mouth parts left in your skin.

So, where is the tattoo?  As far as the bug art is concerned, it is up to YOU to get your skin rash on. Any number of things could happen. It might take a few days for the full color to develop. It might itch like crazy. Don’t scratch the tattoo as it might become infected!! Wash your arm thoroughly in the area of the bites just to stave off infection.

If I get any weird skin reactions, I shall report them, otherwise, I’m out of here for now. Damn, the Tour de Fat was last week and I haven’t bloggered it yet!

Clarence Preston Gillette Approves this message.

This entry was posted on Sunday, September 9th, 2012 at 1:18 pm and is filed under Art, Bugs. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. Both comments and pings are currently closed.